Last Saturday, YMCA soccer teams filled the fields behind the McCook High School and Junior High. The early morning games of 7th and 8th graders were in full swing with those playing at an advantage over those of us on the sidelines, just trying to stay warm.

As I yelled instructions to my team, my lone substitute player standing next to me asked out of the blue, “How long have you been coaching soccer?” 

“Longer than you’ve been alive,” I responded as I tried to concentrate on the game. 

“When did you start coaching?” he continued.

“A long time ago,” I replied, stopping the ball as it rolled out of bounds. 

“When was that?” He was not going to give up until I gave him an exact answer.

“27 years ago.”

“Wow! That was a long time ago,” he said as he trotted onto the field.

He knew it was his turn to sub into the game, while probably not knowing it was a good time to put some distance between himself and me. 

I began coaching soccer in McCook nearly three decades ago. Having played soccer in high school and college, I wanted to share my enthusiasm for the sport after I moved to McCook. 

In the spring of 1996, I stood on the sidelines of Weiland Field, 5 months pregnant with my first child, surrounded by a dozen 7th and 8th graders, coaching my first game of youth soccer. 

I didn’t have a child in the program. I didn’t have a relative on the team. I didn’t even have a friend’s child playing. I had lived in McCook for less than nine months so I knew hardly anyone.

But I volunteered to coach because I simply loved the game and it was the best way to share my passion for the sport. 

The past few weeks I have emphasized the need to be “invited.” And while we need to invite others to join us whether it is for a conversation or at an event, we also need to take the initiative to get involved. Additionally, we need to set aside our preconceived notions about who should be doing things. We need to step up and be willing to share our hobbies, our interests, our skills with others. We need to be willing to step outside our comfort zone to take on something new. We need to buck the system of who we normally think should fill a role.


For example, the job of a lifeguard at our pools has evolved to be filled by high school students. This makes sense since they have their summer off from school and that is when there is most need for a lifeguard. 

But there is no reason that adults cannot fill the job of lifeguarding at our local pools. In fact, if we are going to want the new outdoor city pool and the YMCA indoor pool to be open as many hours as possible, we are going to need more lifeguards - lifeguards of all ages. 

And it just so happens, that it doesn’t cost anything right now to get certified as a lifeguard as the McCook Community Foundation Fund granted funds to the YMCA to cover the cost of certification for the next two years. So that excuse is taken off the table. 

Another area where we seem to have a preconceived notion of who it should be is as a volunteer coach. There is no rule that says you must have a child in the sport to coach the team. Grandparents have stepped up to coach their grandchildren. Friends of the child’s parents have volunteered when asked. But it could also be as simple as the sport is something you did when you were younger. 

Recently, I had a friend begin to help coach junior high track even though she didn’t have a child in the program. Having participated in track and field in high school, she had the experience, ability and desire to share those skills with young people. The more adults who can help with a program, the better.

Another friend is taking on the role of baseball coach this summer, even though his own children are not yet old enough to play on the team. He understands the need for passionate, caring individuals to step forward if want to have these programs in our community, now and in the future. 

Or maybe you have a passion for the theater but singing in public or memorizing lines terrifies you, so you say that you aren’t a theater person. But there is always a need for help with costumes, makeup, choreography, building sets. Again, it is breaking the preconceived notion what makes a theater person - not everyone is out front on the stage but they are still just as important.

It takes all of us getting involved to keep our communities growing and thriving. Consider sharing your hobbies or your interests or your skills with others because ultimately, it is like gift giving: it is better to give than receive.

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Building Connections in McCook Matters June in McCook will be abuzz with fun events including a Youth Summit, hosted by McCook Community Foundation Fund. Our young people in Youth Change Reaction will host the first Nebraska Community Foundation gathering for youth, which will bring youth from across Nebraska to McCook. While still in the planning stages, our students identified that McCook is great because of connections . Our young people easily recognize how critical this factor is to people attraction, to people retention, and to improve their futures. What I miss most about my high school classroom is connections with students and colleagues. In education, I taught first, second, and sometimes third generations in families. My husband, Greg, and I are not McCook natives, but I eventually knew who was related to whom and usually where the parent(s) were employed. Going to the grocery store meant greetings from students and sometimes their family members. I officially retired from my high school classroom nine years ago in May. When you retire, the most-asked question becomes “What do you do with your time?” I try to maintain those connections and make new ones by belonging. For the past seven years, Sharon Bohling and I have volunteered to help plan and organize Bison Days for our high school students, which took place February 10 and 11. It would not happen without the financial support of McCook Community Foundation Fund, plus the McCook High School, local businesses, and the talented people of Southwest Nebraska who say “yes” when one of us reaches out to ask for the donation of time and talent. I would venture that they allow us to be on the Bison Days’ committee because we both have connections within our community—it’s certainly not our computer savvy. Connections can also solve a problem. Recently, I signed up to help a local family in crisis. My morning plan revolved around delivering my donation at a designated drop-off place. That didn’t work out. Fortunately, I still work with youth in various capacities, so I know that Keri Wilkinson works for Camy Bradley. Keri was an organizer for the family fundraiser, so I walked in Camy’s office hoping to find Keri. She was not there, so Camy and I visited briefly. She knew someone (who I did not know) who could possibly give me further direction. Only in a town with connections are you able to interrupt someone’s business, have her reach out for you using her connections , and offer to keep the donations for me until Keri’s return. Another great example of connecting can be found over coffee. Dee Friehe and I are longtime teacher friends. During a chance meeting at the grocery store a few weeks ago, she shared how she was there following a funeral service and was gathering supplies to deliver supper to the grieving family that night. She also updated me on her group of adults who meet for coffee on Thursdays at Ember’s, which varies from 8-28 depending on the day. She recognized the need for adults moving to McCook or folks just wanting to get out to make connections . Dee’s husband, Mark, also hosts his own group of men who are new(er) to McCook. She regaled me with stories of their Christmas party and other special gatherings. Wanting to call McCook your home is solidified by building connections . Ronda Graff has written about McCook Connects which matches a McCook person with someone new to the community of similar interests. I earned my McCook Connects’ T-shirt welcoming a young family with children. We have since spent many hot summer days sitting on bleachers together cheering on our 4-H horse kids while they show their horses. Warning: I connected them with a “free” new-to-them horse. Be careful connecting with me or you’ll probably own a horse. You do not have to be retired to connect in this community. Volunteering is a surefire way to meet people. McCook has many civic groups looking for new faces. Attend a church here; we have many welcoming congregations. Go to ball games or school concerts, attend concerts in the park, learn a new skill through the college, show up at a Third Thursday event or invite the neighbors for a BBQ. Take your youngsters to story hour or Move and Groove at the library. Go watch an event at the Kiplinger Arena. You can even take it a step further: Make a friend or call a friend and invite him/her to go with you. It is human connection that keeps us healthy and happy. If McCook Community Foundation Fund can help you connect in some meaningful way, please reach out for advice or support. *** While Pam Wolford may be retired, she is just as busy serving on the McCook Community Foundation Fund committee and started a new Learn and Return Scholarship with MCFF, while stepping up to grandparent whenever the call comes in.
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