Since this summer marked my family’s 10-year anniversary in McCook, I figured it was a good time to reflect on my time here. When I moved here in the summer of 2013, I knew this was the place that we were supposed to be, but it wasn’t the place I wanted to be. My heart was set on someplace bigger, more metropolitan, with a Trader Joe’s, Indian Food, and a place to drink a cup of coffee and get some Wi-Fi at 9 p.m. 

Needless to say, the first two years were rough. 

I spent a lot of time feeling stuck, thinking about all of the reasons McCook was even worse than I expected. Anytime I happened upon a gripe session, I was quick to pile on. I was biding my time, waiting for a chance to go somewhere, anywhere, that wasn’t here. 

In the summer of 2015, I heard Chuck Schroeder of the Nebraska Rural Futures Institute talking about Broken Bow, about how it was one of the best kept secrets in rural Nebraska. 

I grew up in Broken Bow. It was no secret to me that there was a fate worse than living in McCook - and that was living in Broken Bow. 

Schroeder explained that Broken Bow had changed significantly in recent years. There had been a movement of community transformation in Broken Bow that had started with a group of young residents who made a pact to only talk about how amazing Broken Bow is. Before long people started to believe it. People started investing, volunteering, participating. Before long, things started to change.

I did a little research and found that it was true: Broken Bow is different and still changing. 

Now I was faced with a real crisis of belief. Maybe Broken Bow wasn’t the problem. Maybe McCook wasn’t the problem. Maybe I was the problem, and maybe I had been all along. 

In this moment, I came face-to-face with a very uncomfortable but life changing truth, a truth that I believe is true for each and every one of us. In this life, what I look for I almost always find. 

What do I mean by that? 

For two years, I had looked for reasons to be disappointed, frustrated, discontent, and even angry about living in McCook. And at every turn I found what I was looking for. The more negativity I found, the more I looked for. The more I griped, the more I found. Over and over again. 

As a result, I was miserable, frustrated, and quickly growing bitter and resentful about the place I call home. Something had to change, and I knew that something was me.

Change is never easy and I think there is something about living in Southwest Nebraska that makes change even more painful, but sometimes change is necessary. I prayed and asked God to help me see my situation differently. I made a conscious effort to hunt the good stuff, and to talk about it when I found it. Slowly but surely the bitterness began to recede and eventually it was replaced by joy and even pride. 

I’m always trying to get my friends from Lincoln and Omaha to come out for a visit. They wonder why one would ever visit McCook. After all, I could just come see them. It’s not their fault. They don’t see what I see and they don’t know what they don’t know.

This summer a Lincoln friend finally took me up on my offer. He and his family came for three days and stayed at the Garret House on Norris Avenue. They sat on the porch in the evenings and marveled at how beautiful it is here. They made friends with the neighbors. They visited Nebraska’s only James Beard award-winning restaurant. They had fantastic Italian food, and ordered some of the best burgers in Nebraska from a phone at their booth. They stopped and spent time admiring the beautiful downtown mural. They went on a tour of the Keystone and caught the art installation on the 6th floor. 

Every time I made a recommendation or sent them somewhere, I was so excited. I knew they were going to have an amazing experience and meet kind, wonderful, and thoughtful people. They were blown away by McCook. He called me the other day to tell me he’s going to come back for a few days or maybe a week this fall, “because there’s just something about this place.” I know what he means. I found it too - once I finally decided to look. 

***

In addition to being a committee member of the McCook Community Foundation Fund, Kyle Dellevoet is pastor of McCook Christian Church, a music aficionado and now more than ever, a fervent community advocate. 

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Building Connections in McCook Matters June in McCook will be abuzz with fun events including a Youth Summit, hosted by McCook Community Foundation Fund. Our young people in Youth Change Reaction will host the first Nebraska Community Foundation gathering for youth, which will bring youth from across Nebraska to McCook. While still in the planning stages, our students identified that McCook is great because of connections . Our young people easily recognize how critical this factor is to people attraction, to people retention, and to improve their futures. What I miss most about my high school classroom is connections with students and colleagues. In education, I taught first, second, and sometimes third generations in families. My husband, Greg, and I are not McCook natives, but I eventually knew who was related to whom and usually where the parent(s) were employed. Going to the grocery store meant greetings from students and sometimes their family members. I officially retired from my high school classroom nine years ago in May. When you retire, the most-asked question becomes “What do you do with your time?” I try to maintain those connections and make new ones by belonging. For the past seven years, Sharon Bohling and I have volunteered to help plan and organize Bison Days for our high school students, which took place February 10 and 11. It would not happen without the financial support of McCook Community Foundation Fund, plus the McCook High School, local businesses, and the talented people of Southwest Nebraska who say “yes” when one of us reaches out to ask for the donation of time and talent. I would venture that they allow us to be on the Bison Days’ committee because we both have connections within our community—it’s certainly not our computer savvy. Connections can also solve a problem. Recently, I signed up to help a local family in crisis. My morning plan revolved around delivering my donation at a designated drop-off place. That didn’t work out. Fortunately, I still work with youth in various capacities, so I know that Keri Wilkinson works for Camy Bradley. Keri was an organizer for the family fundraiser, so I walked in Camy’s office hoping to find Keri. She was not there, so Camy and I visited briefly. She knew someone (who I did not know) who could possibly give me further direction. Only in a town with connections are you able to interrupt someone’s business, have her reach out for you using her connections , and offer to keep the donations for me until Keri’s return. Another great example of connecting can be found over coffee. Dee Friehe and I are longtime teacher friends. During a chance meeting at the grocery store a few weeks ago, she shared how she was there following a funeral service and was gathering supplies to deliver supper to the grieving family that night. She also updated me on her group of adults who meet for coffee on Thursdays at Ember’s, which varies from 8-28 depending on the day. She recognized the need for adults moving to McCook or folks just wanting to get out to make connections . Dee’s husband, Mark, also hosts his own group of men who are new(er) to McCook. She regaled me with stories of their Christmas party and other special gatherings. Wanting to call McCook your home is solidified by building connections . Ronda Graff has written about McCook Connects which matches a McCook person with someone new to the community of similar interests. I earned my McCook Connects’ T-shirt welcoming a young family with children. We have since spent many hot summer days sitting on bleachers together cheering on our 4-H horse kids while they show their horses. Warning: I connected them with a “free” new-to-them horse. Be careful connecting with me or you’ll probably own a horse. You do not have to be retired to connect in this community. Volunteering is a surefire way to meet people. McCook has many civic groups looking for new faces. Attend a church here; we have many welcoming congregations. Go to ball games or school concerts, attend concerts in the park, learn a new skill through the college, show up at a Third Thursday event or invite the neighbors for a BBQ. Take your youngsters to story hour or Move and Groove at the library. Go watch an event at the Kiplinger Arena. You can even take it a step further: Make a friend or call a friend and invite him/her to go with you. It is human connection that keeps us healthy and happy. If McCook Community Foundation Fund can help you connect in some meaningful way, please reach out for advice or support. *** While Pam Wolford may be retired, she is just as busy serving on the McCook Community Foundation Fund committee and started a new Learn and Return Scholarship with MCFF, while stepping up to grandparent whenever the call comes in.
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