In the early 2000s, my parents moved from McCook to a lakeside retirement community in Arkansas. Even at the time, it didn’t make sense because they had moved from Omaha to McCook just a few years earlier. Not because I lived in McCook but because of something much more persuasive: the grandkids.
As the U-Haul pulled out of the driveway headed south, my parent’s move made me realize that we had taken the situation for granted. My kids had been very fortunate to have all four grandparents alive and living in the same town.
Not surprisingly, my mother missed her grandkids and they returned to McCook after just a year away. For another few years, my kids again enjoyed having all four grandparents at every school program, every sporting event, every birthday party or just hanging out together.
But that ideal situation ended in 2006 when my mother, Linda, died.
For several more years, the remaining three grandparents were in the front row at every event or sitting around the dining table during the holidays. But within four months of each other, both grandfathers, Pete and then Ron, passed away.
This left our kids with one lone grandmother, Dolores Graff, as their final link to that generation. In those final years, she shared stories about her childhood as one of 10 kids, attended Mass at St. Pat’s as often as she could for as long as she could, and refused to let go of your hand as you left her room. But time and her health took its toll and she died earlier this week.
While it is never a perfect time, it was her time to go and it is the end of an era.
There is a part of me which is sad because they have lost that unconditional love from grandparents which cannot be replicated. But I am glad my kids got to know their grandparents and will continue to be influenced by them through their legacies..
Dolores' impact will be felt by both our family and the community for years to come. During her 88 years. she was a force to be reckoned with. After all, if Dolores wanted to see something happen, she made it happen.
Unsatisfied that McCook didn’t offer recycling in the mid-1990s, she started her own recycling center, which was eventually taken over by the city of McCook. She liked to joke that she knew people made fun of the banker’s wife playing in garbage, but she didn’t care. She knew what she wanted and she made it happen.
Dolores was also thorough, much to the chagrin of others. She served two terms on the McCook School Board, even after all her 11 children had graduated from high school. She valued education and simply wanted the best school system for her community.
And she devoted herself to that role. While others “crack” open their packet for the first time at the school board meeting, Dolores would arrive having read and reread every page. She had things underlined, paragraphs highlighted and questions ready to be asked. If she didn’t know the answer, she was going to keep asking and learning until she understood and could make an informed decision.
And Dolores had a penchant for names and faces, not only remembering someone she met years before but also their kids names, where they were going to school and how many dogs they had. Meanwhile, I struggle to remember the name of someone I met five minutes ago. Dolores also loved introducing people to others. Even in her final residence at Hillcrest Nursing Home, she took great pleasure in asking if her nurse or aide knew my husband or me. Never mind that we had met them dozens of times by then, Dolores wanted to make sure everyone knew each other and felt comfortable.
I must admit that there is a twinge of jealousy when I see people able to hug their parents or invite them over for dinner. Or when grandparents fill the stands to watch their grandchildren or simply sit around with a grandchild on their lap.
Instead, I will continue to be grateful for the years we had together, for the meals which always started late and for the many, many stories, from using aloe plants to heal BB guns injuries, to being lost in a blizzard with just one priest to bless us.
Whether it is your parent, your grandparents or just an elderly family friend, don’t take them for granted. Reach out to them as often as you can, whether it’s a phone call or just a text. Heck, maybe even go as far as write them a letter to tell them how much you appreciate them.
And while we’re at it, don’t forget your friends...the family you get to choose. Let them know how grateful you are to have them in your life. My days wouldn’t be as rich without my morning coffee club, my pseudo volleyball team or my Taco Tuesday cohorts.
While this Thanksgiving will look like no other, it is still the perfect time to show gratitude for all of the important people in your life. If your family is near (and it is safe to do so), give them a hug and tell them you love them. If your family is being kept apart, make that phone call and tell them how grateful you are for them.
And if you still have a grandparent around, don’t take it for granted. Instead, be grateful because it will come to an end all too soon.
Recognizing the Assets and Abundance in Your Community One of the key philosophies of the Nebraska Community Foundation (NCF) is about looking at our community for its abundance – what it has – and not for its scarcity – what it is lacking. Where did this thought come from, and why is it important to NCF? Several years ago, NCF had a close working relationship with John L. McKnight, a professor who studied and taught community organizing and building. After joining Northwestern University in Illinois, he created the Center for Urban Affairs and then later was a co-creator of the Asset Based Community Development Institute. His work was serious academic research followed by practical application in communities. His goal was to find what makes communities prosper and thrive – especially why some do and some don’t – and to provide a guide for others to replicate the successful communities. He studied the writings of Alexis de Tocqueville in Democracy in America, in which Tocqueville proposed that the success of American society was from its many varied informal associations – the small, local citizen organizations of engaged volunteers. Key characteristics of these groups were: they were generally small, there was face-to-face knowledge of each other and the capabilities of each member, and the essential work of the group was performed by unpaid members (volunteers). More importantly, these groups were taking on the power to define problems or goals for their communities; to create solutions or actions to achieve their goals; and to implement the solutions or actions. Tocqueville called these people citizens and noted that they were taking power by making power through community action. They were taking ownership and pride in their communities and assuming the responsibilities required to build their hometowns. NCF has adapted these concepts in how it works with and through its affiliated funds. NCF believes that only the citizens of a community know what it needs, and outsiders (government, organizations or even NCF) should only come if invited to assist but not to determine a plan of action. Asset Based Community Development stresses that a community has all it needs to thrive, including the physical assets but, more importantly, its people. Citizens, with their unique gifts and expertise, their willingness to give of their time and talents, and their ability to give financial resources when needed are the true assets of a community. These citizens need to be invited to become engaged as a community to build their hometowns. Leadership is organically developed and broadly distributed through these associations of engaged citizens. The Fund Advisory Committees (FAC) across Nebraska are NCF’s volunteer associations. The committees made up of dedicated volunteers have an overall view of the whole community, to look at what the community’s assets are, to dream about how to enhance and utilize these assets, to engage its citizens so that they offer their time and talents to better their community, and to collaborate with the other associations (including business, government and institutions) to move their community forward. Your local FAC is the 12-member volunteer group of the McCook Community Foundation Fund (an NCF affiliated fund) along with a coordinator. NCF also has volunteer committees in Southwest Nebraska including Stratton, Imperial and Grant. NCF recognizes that effective community development has three qualities: it is asset-based, internally-focused, and relationship-driven. Why is this work even more crucial than ever? Because in the past three decades, we have seen a transition away from engaged citizens belonging to volunteer associations to build their hometown to disengaged residents giving up their power and expecting paid service providers (mostly government and human service organizations) to provide the social, educational, cultural, health and economic needs of the community. The focus of abundance and asset-based communities can be explained as such: When people discover what they have, they find power. When people join together in new connections and relationships, they build power. When people become more productive together, they exercise their power to realize dreams. “This idea of co-creation is key to a satisfying life, which becomes possible when we join our neighbors to live and create a community that nurtures our family and makes us useful citizens.” John L. McKnight For more information about the McCook FAC, visit the website www.mccookfoundation.org . If you are ready to become an engaged citizen, check out some of the local groups listed on the McCook Volunteers page of the website. If you are interested in being a member of the MCFF FAC, contact any FAC member or the coordinator, Ronda Graff. Let’s work together to build a great hometown and make McCook a better place to call home. *** Although technically retired, Peggy Been serves as the secretary for the McCook Community Foundation Fund and is busier than ever by volunteering at St. Patrick Elementary cafeteria and caring for her dad and her grandchildren.
Two projects for McCook youth highlight the community's history as well as choices that affect their future.
Communities needs jobs and houses but we also need places that young people and families want to live and community leaders are doing one project at a time, especially to get recent graduates to move back home.
Checking on Our Success Is Now Urgent As the Chief Financial Officer for Community Hospital in McCook, I tell people that I have three major worries. The first concern is demographics. As we model out our population changes in Red Willow County between the 202 census and where we expect to be for the 2030 census, we know that if we continue on our historical trends that we would end this decade with a decrease of about 520 people or about five percent fewer residents. This drop is compounded by two other factors: an aging community, resulting in 15 percent fewer working-age population members (20-64 year olds) or about 875 fewer people; and a 24 percent increase of the Medicare-aged population in the country or about 515 more people in that category. From the healthcare perspective, this creates both financial challenges and operational challenges. On the fiscal side, Medicare payments do not cover the full cost of providing care compared to traditional insurance. For day-to-day operations, we will have a smaller workforce to draw upon to take care of more elderly community members. So Community Hospital made it part of its mission to make the community a better place to live, work and play as we need a vibrant community in order to attract the workforce needed to provide the care our community needs. We have thrown our support behind the community amenity improvement projects, including McCook’s new outdoor aquatic center and the city’s ball fields, the McCook YMCA renovation and expansion campaign, the inclusive playground at Kelley Park and many more projects. We have invested in housing, from participating in the McCook Economic Development Corp.’s North Point project to downtown student housing, which serves two purposes: engaging the medical young professionals more fully into McCook’s activities and businesses as well as freeing up some housing currently used by the hospital to house these students. These are not just frivolous projects that are nice to have. All of these projects and more are needed if we want to maintain a level of economic sustainability over the next decade and for the next generations. Families need them. Young people need them. All ages need them. And this movement in our community cannot be pushed down the road any longer. On March 13, the U.S. Census Bureau released their 2024 population estimates by county. Unfortunately, as we near the half way point of the decade, we are not moving in the right direction. The internal forecast we prepared for long-range planning at the hospital showed that the population of Red Willow County would have decreased by 230 people by 2024 to a total of 10,495. The census data, which counts between the regular census every decade, relies on birth and death certificates, as well as other federal data basis such as Social Security, IRS and postal records. Currently, the estimate is for Red Willow County is at 10,409, nearly 100 fewer people than we had projected. And we are not alone in this fight for people. Hitchcock County to our west is down 155 people to 2,460, while Furnas County to our east is down 170 people to 4,468. This results in our three-county area losing a total population of 618 over the past four years. The improvements we have been making have not yet had time to leave their mark. The new city pool is open with the remodeled YMCA, ballparks and playgrounds scheduled for completion over the next few years so we will see their impact down the road. But I am optimistic that these amenities and projects will have a meaningful impact on our ability to attract and retain people over time, both for the hospital and for the community. We will continue to watch the official counts for signs of progress, working to stop the out-migration and hopefully see a shift to an increase in population. Ultimately, it will take everyone’s effort and input - from local businesses to individuals - to make the community grow and thrive and to say that we have found success. *** Sean Wolfe is the CFO for Community Hospital and the treasurer for McCook Community Foundation Fund, along with numerous other volunteer roles in the community and has a passion for making his hometown an even better place to call home.
Jeremy Shaw named April 2025 McCook Volunteer of the Month
While the Bison Alumni Newsletter will still be available digitally, a new printed service is available.
During a recent performance at the Fox Theater by the Lied's Arts Across Nebraska, there was one group who was not thanked: those who showed up for the event, which is a big deal.
Mark Friehe named March McCook Volunteer of the Month.
Although the Bodensteiners no longer live in Southwest Nebraska, they are still connected and wanted to see if prosper and thrive.
From long-term projects to weekly events, you cannot say "there is nothing to do" or "nothing is happening."
