On the bookshelf in my bedroom sits a frame containing a yellowed Family Circus cartoon. The drawing shows the disheveled mom trying to corral her four small children. Meanwhile, a well-meaning - but not terribly helpful - elderly lady gives the stereotypical advice: Enjoy them every minute. Before you can turn around, they’ll be grown.”
I’ve had that picture for more than two decades, probably when the fourth of my seven children arrived. And while I likely smirked when I received it, there is a reason that advice continues to apply. Because it is true.
It is why we say “the days are long, but the years are short.”
It is why we say “time flies when you are having fun.” Heck, time flies even when you aren’t having fun. Ask any mom.
But whether you are in the midst of changing diapers non-stop or building a career or just trying to get by, the days can slip by seemingly in the blink of an eye. Followed by months going by in a blur. And before you know it, years have passed.
This is where intentionality comes into play. Unless we intentionally make the effort to enjoy the moment or to reach out to someone, time - and life - can slip by so quickly.
And that is how I recently ended up in Texas, despite less than perfect circumstances like a pandemic.
As my 25th anniversary approached, I knew I didn’t want to buy my husband, Jon, yet another gift that I would have to dust or wash or add to the clutter at our house.
Instead, I reached out to the best man from our wedding, Mike, who had been my husband’s college roommate, to reconnect. It had been 23 years since we had seen him in person, when my husband had served as the best man in Mike’s wedding.
While now is not ideal for just about anything, everything from travel itinerary to days off from work lined up. So last weekend, the three of us caught up on two decades of our lives, from vacations to jobs, even stupid vehicle purchases. We discovered that all our kids are avid swimmers, some at the collegiate level.
In the end, it was like we hadn’t missed a beat, much less decades. There was some regret that we hadn’t been able to see each other’s kids grow up and many birthdays and anniversary had been missed. But we left with an appreciation and a hopefulness, knowing that we had reconnected and would do better in the future to maintain contact.
Afterward, I wondered how we managed to miss so many years of each other’s lives, but it was never intentional. It is just life.
Personally, we got busy raising kids, working and volunteering, and maintaining a house. Our friend Mike was busy raising his own family, moving around the country and serving more than a dozen tours overseas during his 25-year military career.
As my husband said on the way home, perhaps this was the first time we could have connected and we needed to appreciate that it happened at all.
I’ve said it before and I’ll continue to say it: There is never a perfect time to do something. If you wait for it to be perfect, it will never happen.
We could have waited for the pandemic to be over, but who knows when or if things will return to normal. We could have waited for all of us to retire, but who knows when or if that will happen. If I think I have a risky lifestyle by riding my bike down a highway with semis barrelling by us at 70 mph, that’s relatively safe compared to our friend who flies helicopters for the border patrol catching drug runners.
I am not saying you need to hop on a plane to visit your long-lost aunt in another state or drain your savings to see your childhood friend across the globe.
Perhaps it is a phone call to an elderlly neighbor to let them know you are thinking of them. Maybe it is taking a dessert to that mom who hasn’t had five minutes to wash her hair. Or just dropping a card in the mail to your friend to let them know you are thinking of them. Finding a hand-written note in the mailbox is 10-times better than a stack of bills or election fliers.
Like I said, there is never a perfect time...there is only time...time to be intentional.
Jeremy Shaw named April 2025 McCook Volunteer of the Month
While the Bison Alumni Newsletter will still be available digitally, a new printed service is available.
During a recent performance at the Fox Theater by the Lied's Arts Across Nebraska, there was one group who was not thanked: those who showed up for the event, which is a big deal.
Mark Friehe named March McCook Volunteer of the Month.
Although the Bodensteiners no longer live in Southwest Nebraska, they are still connected and wanted to see if prosper and thrive.
From long-term projects to weekly events, you cannot say "there is nothing to do" or "nothing is happening."
With the goal of reaching 200 subscriptions, the Bison Alumni Newsletter is launching a subscription service.
Long-time volunteer Don Harpst was recognized as the first McCook Volunteer of the Month in March 2025.
McCook's youth survey shows that young people now value safety in their community, something McCook provides.
Building Connections in McCook Matters June in McCook will be abuzz with fun events including a Youth Summit, hosted by McCook Community Foundation Fund. Our young people in Youth Change Reaction will host the first Nebraska Community Foundation gathering for youth, which will bring youth from across Nebraska to McCook. While still in the planning stages, our students identified that McCook is great because of connections . Our young people easily recognize how critical this factor is to people attraction, to people retention, and to improve their futures. What I miss most about my high school classroom is connections with students and colleagues. In education, I taught first, second, and sometimes third generations in families. My husband, Greg, and I are not McCook natives, but I eventually knew who was related to whom and usually where the parent(s) were employed. Going to the grocery store meant greetings from students and sometimes their family members. I officially retired from my high school classroom nine years ago in May. When you retire, the most-asked question becomes “What do you do with your time?” I try to maintain those connections and make new ones by belonging. For the past seven years, Sharon Bohling and I have volunteered to help plan and organize Bison Days for our high school students, which took place February 10 and 11. It would not happen without the financial support of McCook Community Foundation Fund, plus the McCook High School, local businesses, and the talented people of Southwest Nebraska who say “yes” when one of us reaches out to ask for the donation of time and talent. I would venture that they allow us to be on the Bison Days’ committee because we both have connections within our community—it’s certainly not our computer savvy. Connections can also solve a problem. Recently, I signed up to help a local family in crisis. My morning plan revolved around delivering my donation at a designated drop-off place. That didn’t work out. Fortunately, I still work with youth in various capacities, so I know that Keri Wilkinson works for Camy Bradley. Keri was an organizer for the family fundraiser, so I walked in Camy’s office hoping to find Keri. She was not there, so Camy and I visited briefly. She knew someone (who I did not know) who could possibly give me further direction. Only in a town with connections are you able to interrupt someone’s business, have her reach out for you using her connections , and offer to keep the donations for me until Keri’s return. Another great example of connecting can be found over coffee. Dee Friehe and I are longtime teacher friends. During a chance meeting at the grocery store a few weeks ago, she shared how she was there following a funeral service and was gathering supplies to deliver supper to the grieving family that night. She also updated me on her group of adults who meet for coffee on Thursdays at Ember’s, which varies from 8-28 depending on the day. She recognized the need for adults moving to McCook or folks just wanting to get out to make connections . Dee’s husband, Mark, also hosts his own group of men who are new(er) to McCook. She regaled me with stories of their Christmas party and other special gatherings. Wanting to call McCook your home is solidified by building connections . Ronda Graff has written about McCook Connects which matches a McCook person with someone new to the community of similar interests. I earned my McCook Connects’ T-shirt welcoming a young family with children. We have since spent many hot summer days sitting on bleachers together cheering on our 4-H horse kids while they show their horses. Warning: I connected them with a “free” new-to-them horse. Be careful connecting with me or you’ll probably own a horse. You do not have to be retired to connect in this community. Volunteering is a surefire way to meet people. McCook has many civic groups looking for new faces. Attend a church here; we have many welcoming congregations. Go to ball games or school concerts, attend concerts in the park, learn a new skill through the college, show up at a Third Thursday event or invite the neighbors for a BBQ. Take your youngsters to story hour or Move and Groove at the library. Go watch an event at the Kiplinger Arena. You can even take it a step further: Make a friend or call a friend and invite him/her to go with you. It is human connection that keeps us healthy and happy. If McCook Community Foundation Fund can help you connect in some meaningful way, please reach out for advice or support. *** While Pam Wolford may be retired, she is just as busy serving on the McCook Community Foundation Fund committee and started a new Learn and Return Scholarship with MCFF, while stepping up to grandparent whenever the call comes in.
