Many of my children have played instruments with the school band over the years. Others have
taken years of piano lessons, wrapping up with the mandatory recital at the end of the season.
But my youngest son is the first to pick up the guitar, trying to learn the instrument and has even
started a band of his own.
While most of the practicing has been at friends’ homes, there is still the faint strumming coming
from my basement occasionally as my son learns new chords and practices finger placement.
In this age of instant gratification, it is nice to hear him struggle, put the guitar away for a while
and then pick it up again later. I am not an aficionado so I have no idea if he is getting better. I
don’t recognize any of the sounds drifting up the stairs, but until he learns some ‘80s music, I
doubt I’ll know what he is playing.
While it will be great if - and when - he masters the guitar, it is great to see him have shown
interest in something new in the first place and perhaps even more importantly - taken the step
to try it knowing it may be months to get better or even years or a lifetime to master it.
Very few of us are good at something from the start. We stumble out of the gate, struggle to
stay motivated and yearn to get better. These issues are why most of us keep from even
starting. We shy away from trying something new for the fear of failure. Or to put it bluntly,
because we may suck at it.
If we only stick with what we know how to do, how will we learn a new hobby?
If we don’t try something that challenges us, how will we ever push ourselves to take on a new
skill?
We need to learn that it is O.K. to not be great at something at the start. Even down the road,
you may still stumble often but at least you tried. You put yourself out there to be vulnerable, to
maybe even hurt yourself along the way and most likely to embarrass yourself.
But that is where growth comes from, where you meet new people and where you make
memories. And we’ve made quite a few lately.
Our current exchange student is a great example of taking a chance on something new.
For starters, he traveled thousands of miles from home to live in a foreign country.
Even after he arrived, he has a willingness to try new things. Venturing to the nearby lakes with
our boat, he has tried several times to get up on a wakeboard to no avail. We even switched to
water skis, hoping that would be easier. Success still eluded him but he maintained a smile on
his face the entire time. Thankfully, fat-tire biking and paddleboarding for the first time was
easier to achieve.
And sometimes you learn sooner rather than later that your intended skill isn’t what you want
and you need to pivot.
My youngest daughter called mid-morning on her first official day of college classes. She had
just completed her first class in cosmetology school and quickly realized that was not the
profession for her. I asked her to tough it out just a bit longer. A few hours later she called back
and proudly announced that she had made it through the day and that she was changing
majors. I told her that everyone changes majors, that we all need to try new things and that yes,
her mom and dad were still trying to figure out what they want to be when they grow up.
After all, there is so much out there for us to try like auditioning for a community play or taking
up golf. There is so much out there for us to perhaps fail at but possibly for us to succeed at like
learning to paint or trying disc golf. And there is so much out there for us to meet others in our
communities like just walking around the farmer’s market or attending a Third Thursday. When
we take a chance and try something new, that is when the transformation happens in ourselves
and in our communities.
