With my mother-in-law, Dolores Graff, celebrating her 88th birthday on Friday, my family will wrap up a month chock full of birthdays, including mine a few weeks ago.
If birthdays do nothing else, they give you a chance to reflect on the past year and evaluate what you have accomplished and what has happened in your life. Sometimes it is a good reflection; other times you may be left wanting to just forget.
Studies show that as you grow older, the years tend to blur together because there are fewer momentous occasions to distinguish the days. Once the single-year birthdays, graduations, wedding and births are no longer a regular part of your life, the days are just filled with trying to figure out what to make for dinner every evening.
If you don’t think this is true, glance at a rack of birthday cards. You can find cards celebrating every single year from one to 10 years old, but then the gaps start by leaping to 13 to mark the start of the teenage years, 16 gets its own section and 21 warrants a couple rows. But from then on, it’s every decade and the cards only get snarkier, like you are just lucky to be alive.
Unlike when we are young, people were hesitant to ask my age after wishing me a happy birthday this year. While I’m not going to scream from the rooftops that I’m now 48, there is an alternative to getting a year older and it involves an appearance on another page in the paper….the obits.
With seven kids, a question people regularly do ask me is if I wish I could go back to those days of diapers and bottles. Not a chance and not because I didn’t enjoy it. Yes, there were days that nighttime couldn’t come early enough but for the most part, I wouldn’t trade those days when the kids were small with days spent swinging at the park, swimming at the pool or sitting on the floor for library story hour.
But those days are over and can’t be brought back. Rather, I’ve moved onto the next phase of life where my kids are old enough to fend for themselves if I just don’t feel like making dinner.
O.K. that was never really an issue. I’m only half-joking when I say that I could be passed out on the kitchen floor and they would have used me as a step-stool to reach the box of cereal before calling someone for help.
Currently, the years are marked with high school and college graduations. The last two kids will soon have their driver’s licenses. And wedding and birth announcements are likely only a few years away. But those special occasions will come to an end and it is up to each of us to consciously make those years stand out.
A few years ago as the years seemed to start to fly by, I decided I had to do something momentous or outside-the-box each year. So I did an Ironman triathlon which required 15 hours swimming, biking and running. I acted (if you want to call it that) in a local theater production, despite the fact that my memorization skills are non-existent. And last year, I hauled 8 people around Europe for two weeks and lost no one in the process.
As for the future, I still have high hopes to publish a book, learn to play the banjo and keep a plant alive for more than a year. Sometimes, it pays not to set the bar too high.
As for aspirations for the community, I have 2027 marked on my calendar. Not only is that the year my youngest son will graduate from high school, but we better have a new aquatic center in place.
Whether it is the start of a new year or your birthday, everyone should take a moment or two to really consider what they would like to accomplish over the next year. What do you want to see happen over the next five to 10 years, whether personally or in your community?
And if you think you are too old to start something today, consider this: You’ll still be one year older next year. Wouldn’t it be great to be one year older and have something to show for it like being able to playing “Dueling Banjos” from Deliverance?
Jeremy Shaw named April 2025 McCook Volunteer of the Month
While the Bison Alumni Newsletter will still be available digitally, a new printed service is available.
During a recent performance at the Fox Theater by the Lied's Arts Across Nebraska, there was one group who was not thanked: those who showed up for the event, which is a big deal.
Mark Friehe named March McCook Volunteer of the Month.
Although the Bodensteiners no longer live in Southwest Nebraska, they are still connected and wanted to see if prosper and thrive.
From long-term projects to weekly events, you cannot say "there is nothing to do" or "nothing is happening."
With the goal of reaching 200 subscriptions, the Bison Alumni Newsletter is launching a subscription service.
Long-time volunteer Don Harpst was recognized as the first McCook Volunteer of the Month in March 2025.
McCook's youth survey shows that young people now value safety in their community, something McCook provides.
Building Connections in McCook Matters June in McCook will be abuzz with fun events including a Youth Summit, hosted by McCook Community Foundation Fund. Our young people in Youth Change Reaction will host the first Nebraska Community Foundation gathering for youth, which will bring youth from across Nebraska to McCook. While still in the planning stages, our students identified that McCook is great because of connections . Our young people easily recognize how critical this factor is to people attraction, to people retention, and to improve their futures. What I miss most about my high school classroom is connections with students and colleagues. In education, I taught first, second, and sometimes third generations in families. My husband, Greg, and I are not McCook natives, but I eventually knew who was related to whom and usually where the parent(s) were employed. Going to the grocery store meant greetings from students and sometimes their family members. I officially retired from my high school classroom nine years ago in May. When you retire, the most-asked question becomes “What do you do with your time?” I try to maintain those connections and make new ones by belonging. For the past seven years, Sharon Bohling and I have volunteered to help plan and organize Bison Days for our high school students, which took place February 10 and 11. It would not happen without the financial support of McCook Community Foundation Fund, plus the McCook High School, local businesses, and the talented people of Southwest Nebraska who say “yes” when one of us reaches out to ask for the donation of time and talent. I would venture that they allow us to be on the Bison Days’ committee because we both have connections within our community—it’s certainly not our computer savvy. Connections can also solve a problem. Recently, I signed up to help a local family in crisis. My morning plan revolved around delivering my donation at a designated drop-off place. That didn’t work out. Fortunately, I still work with youth in various capacities, so I know that Keri Wilkinson works for Camy Bradley. Keri was an organizer for the family fundraiser, so I walked in Camy’s office hoping to find Keri. She was not there, so Camy and I visited briefly. She knew someone (who I did not know) who could possibly give me further direction. Only in a town with connections are you able to interrupt someone’s business, have her reach out for you using her connections , and offer to keep the donations for me until Keri’s return. Another great example of connecting can be found over coffee. Dee Friehe and I are longtime teacher friends. During a chance meeting at the grocery store a few weeks ago, she shared how she was there following a funeral service and was gathering supplies to deliver supper to the grieving family that night. She also updated me on her group of adults who meet for coffee on Thursdays at Ember’s, which varies from 8-28 depending on the day. She recognized the need for adults moving to McCook or folks just wanting to get out to make connections . Dee’s husband, Mark, also hosts his own group of men who are new(er) to McCook. She regaled me with stories of their Christmas party and other special gatherings. Wanting to call McCook your home is solidified by building connections . Ronda Graff has written about McCook Connects which matches a McCook person with someone new to the community of similar interests. I earned my McCook Connects’ T-shirt welcoming a young family with children. We have since spent many hot summer days sitting on bleachers together cheering on our 4-H horse kids while they show their horses. Warning: I connected them with a “free” new-to-them horse. Be careful connecting with me or you’ll probably own a horse. You do not have to be retired to connect in this community. Volunteering is a surefire way to meet people. McCook has many civic groups looking for new faces. Attend a church here; we have many welcoming congregations. Go to ball games or school concerts, attend concerts in the park, learn a new skill through the college, show up at a Third Thursday event or invite the neighbors for a BBQ. Take your youngsters to story hour or Move and Groove at the library. Go watch an event at the Kiplinger Arena. You can even take it a step further: Make a friend or call a friend and invite him/her to go with you. It is human connection that keeps us healthy and happy. If McCook Community Foundation Fund can help you connect in some meaningful way, please reach out for advice or support. *** While Pam Wolford may be retired, she is just as busy serving on the McCook Community Foundation Fund committee and started a new Learn and Return Scholarship with MCFF, while stepping up to grandparent whenever the call comes in.
