If there are still a few people on your list who need a gift, it is time to resort to my personal favorite gift: create a handwritten note for an event or product to be redeemed next year. It is kind of like a gift certificate without the hassle of buying one. 

But actually, the best gift we can give can’t be bought in a store. One of the best gifts we can give is showing compassion for others. It is taking the time to listen to one another; it is trying to understand each other; it is simply caring about someone other than ourself.

Before I was writing this, I was lamenting that my oldest daughter will not be spending Christmas this year. She is only four hours away and could make the trip home. But it wasn’t until she explained why that I realized we need to think about others and think about the big picture. 

On a regular basis, she volunteers with low-income residents facing eviction…the very people who cannot afford to get sick and miss work. She doesn’t want to risk getting herself sick, nor infecting them. It was a tough choice to be away from her family over the holidays, but it is what she feels is best. 

If there is one thing we have learned over this past year, it is that there is no perfect answer. Instead, we need to take the time to listen and be willing to open ourselves up to the idea that we don’t know everything, that we may be wrong, that we may need to change our minds. 

And be willing to acknowledge that it is impossible to know everything that is going on in someone else’s life.

More than once this year, I have found myself frustrated with someone, only to find out later that I didn’t have the whole picture. 

A friend hadn’t returned the text because they were short-staffed at work as yet another employee was on quarantine. Another friend was terse on a phone call, only to find out later they had gotten into a heated disagreement with their brother-in-law earlier in the day.

And until my daughter explained who she was volunteering with, I didn’t understand why she would choose being home alone in her apartment rather than spending the holidays with her family. 

And while will miss her over the holidays, it’s actually not the first time she has been absent Christmas morning. She missed Christmas as well as her grandfathers’ funerals because she was in Germany her junior year of high school. So if we can be apart for 11 months and miss some major milestones, we can do it again if it benefits others.

After all, this is what is great about the holidays. People just seem to be more generous this time of year but it is something we could parlay throughout the year.

Maybe it is delivering a meal to your neighbor who doesn’t like venturing out. Maybe it is creating a gift bags to hand out to those who are down on their luck. Or maybe it is a simple as just listening…listening to someone you don’t agree with, listening to someone who tells the same story over and over, or listening to to your friend who has had everything go wrong this year and is hoping 2021 will be just a little bit better.

At the end of the day, if just tried to understand each other better, walk a mile in someone else’s shoes and showed a bit more compassion toward each other, we could make a our world just a little bit better. We can make our community an even better place to call home.

On behalf of the entire McCook Community Foundation Fund’s Advisory Committee, we wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a safe and happy holiday season. 

Ronda Graff is considering giving her kids the same handmade certificates as last year: pedicure and massage…with her tagging along.